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What really gets up [i]your[/i] nose?
(63 posts) (29 voices)
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edward hack
offlineMemberBecoming instantly invisible when I take my mate out in his wheelchair.
I guess mums and prams get the same reaction?
People in groups of four who inisit in walking side by side - expecting you to step out into the road.
People on mobile phones walking down the street who think the rest of us should get out of their wayPosted 2 years ago # -
The All New Jeni B
offlineMemberEdward, absolutely!
Used to take my Grandad out in his wheelchair, and it drove me mad.
Eventually I resorted to the same tactics I used with the YM's pram/buggy - ram the fuckers in the ankle.
With you on the walking side by side thing too, and have been taking to stopping dead as the group approaches, growling, and forcing them to go around me, then shouting about them not owning the fucking pavement.
It does earn me some funny looks, but I'm beyond rational about it now.Posted 2 years ago # -
MrChigleysAunt
offlineMemberOnce, when my wife was changing a nappy, and was taking a peek to see that she'd cleaned up properly, my son let rip with a liquid poo which went right up my wife's nose.
It doesn't get up my nose, of course, because it was hilarious, but my wife still gets flashbacks.Posted 2 years ago # -
The All New Jeni B
offlineMemberPerhaps it should be saved for the speeches when he gets married.
Which was how my dad got revenge for being woken at 2.30 one morning by an overly excited 3yr old announcing, "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!!! I can whistle backwards!"
Bastard.Posted 2 years ago # -
Stan Laurel
offlineMemberAnt, nicely covered by Bryson in "Small Notes" about an M&S checkout queue in Exeter.
Sorry, but would like to speak up for Top Gear. Childish, formulaic, I know, but try to think of it as the Goodies.
What gets up the Laurel nose? Adults who used to buy the adult and children's 'versions' of Harry Potter books. They are the same people who forget that Dr. Who is for kids and not a new religion.
Oh! And pollen.
Posted 2 years ago # -
fernandomando
offlineMemberHas anyone mentioned cocaine?
Posted 2 years ago # -
theumpire
offlineMemberGreat writer, Bill B. I laughed myself silly over his account of his attempts to leave Oxford in a rented car (Notes from a Small Island).
At my son's graduation ceremony at Durham University (BB is the Chancellor), he told of a friend whose answer-phone message ran along the lines of -
"I'm going through some life changes at the moment, so leave your name and number and I might get back to you. If I don't get back to you - you're one of those changes!"
Posted 2 years ago # -
The All New Jeni B
offlineMemberMy husband, coming home at lunchtime and throwing a shouty, stroppy hissy fit, because he's stressed out at work.
I made the suggestion that perhaps he should fuck off and come back in a better mood.
Or alternatively, don a police uniform and drive to Rothbury.Posted 2 years ago # -
Svendo
offlineMembersomething which is really bugging me at the moment is idiots that cannot understand statistical data... There's a forum at work and being based in Newcastle a thread has sprung up about Mr Moat and his Police shooting hijinx. The knee jerk has been people saying that all the Police should be armed now (because of this and the cumbrian shootings). Myself and some of my more learned colleagues tried to point out that statistically these are isolated incidents and that just because they happened within 2 months of each other is not relevant. Someones actual argument to this was "Well they've arrested two people on murder charges in Rothbury so now there's 3 of them it definitely isnt isolated".
Posted 2 years ago # -
thisisall1word
offlineMemberGravity.
Washing up when the water squirts out of a mug, when I squeeze the scourer inside it, and then goes over my work shirt.
People who redesigned washing up bottles so that the squirty bit points out at a 45 degree angle. Why? Again work shirt covered...Posted 2 years ago # -
The All New Jeni B
offlineMemberThis is purely a problem for men. I, for one, have never suffered at the hands of a redesigned washing up bottle.
I have inadvertently scooshed hot soapy water up my sleeve when squishing the sponge into a mug...
Posted 2 years ago # -
Mr Target
offlineMemberOnce, when my wife was changing a nappy, and was taking a peek to see that she'd cleaned up properly, my son let rip with a liquid poo which went right up my wife's nose.
I think my wife has her revenge planned
To be honest with you, I thought you were going to tell us that your wife was just waiting for the right moment to return fire...
Posted 2 years ago # -
The All New Jeni B
offlineMemberHearing about a heatwave in the south east while enduring a torrential downpour.
Posted 2 years ago # -
thisisall1word
offlineMemberHearing about a torrential downpour in the North-lands while enduring a heatwave down South.
Posted 2 years ago # -
thisisall1word
offlineMemberMy flat, and thus my landlord, for not having/installed a freezer. I want ice dammit.
Posted 2 years ago # -
The All New Jeni B
offlineMemberTough! We've got tons in our freezer.
Ner ner, ner ner ner! *blows raspberry*Posted 2 years ago # -
thisisall1word
offlineMemberCan you not just step outside and chisel ice from the massive glaciers mere steps from yr door?
Might buy a paddling pool even though I have no garden - my kitchen can just fit one in - weekend spent sitting in cool water drinking gin fizzes with the fridge door open.Posted 2 years ago #
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