Mixing booze and politics may cause Ukip with serious consequences for the individual and the country, according to Chief Medical Officer Professor Dame Sally Davies.
The government has warned that the condition is heading for epidemic proportions but has appeared powerless to contain it.
'It's worse than foot and mouth,' said a government minister, 'though this is more mouth.'
'I can't stress strongly enough,' Professor Davies says in her report,'the dangers of drinking alcohol and talking politics. It can make the individual unduly argumentative and irrational. In some cases, he may make outlandish claims - such as that he is about to become prime minister or that he leads a mythical 'people's army.''
Professor Davies added that Ukip sufferers could became morbidly suspicious of foreigners and ultra-conservative in outlook. They produce crazy solutions to perceived problems.
'He sees immigrants everywhere and entertains fears that Romanians are living next door to him and are ravishing his German missus while he's down the pub,' she said.
'Typically, a Ukip sufferer will make a virtue out of boozing and smoking and, whatever his actual social class, will posture as one of a lower social status. So an ex-stockbroker may pretend to be one of the boys.'
Professor Davies added that Ukip sufferers thrived on attention.
It's believed that other opinionated individuals - such as politicians - at first take the piss out of Ukip sufferers, then become fearful of them.
'They are best ignored,' Professor Davies said. 'Pub landlords should throw them out on their neck as soon as they start spouting politics. It would be a service to the nation.
'The only real cure is to pack them off somewhere abroad. Six months convalescing in Brussels should do it,' she said, 'or a one way visit to a clinic in Switzerland.'