The Daily Mail is seeking to appoint the UK's most innovative Hypochondriac to take over the Editorship of the 250 strong team that creates our award-winning Good Health Section.
Here at Good Health our mission is to eliminate the risks of living by revealing the horrifying dangers of life itself. The successful candidate will have first hand experience of either cancer or another killer disease - and will likely have suffered a recent heart scare. He or she should have survived major surgery on several occasions and could well have been pronounced clinically dead at some stage of their career.
Our new Health Editor will arrive with an impressive prescription for a range of life-saving drugs. Once in post, he or she will enjoy a wide package of other benefits - including annual check-ups, occasional blood transfusions and regular migraine headaches.
He or she will be alive to the current range of life-threatening issues and will certainly have given up smoking, sprinkling salt, dairy products, dieting, binge eating/drinking, taking sugar in tea and coffee, sunbathing, red meat, bullfighting, eating bacon and/or saturated fats, alcohol and going to bed after midnight. Key duties will include an expectation to discover a regular line of terrifying new complaints that are of ongoing interest to our discerning readers.
If you share all and more of these obsessions and can persuade others to suffer equally then please write (taking great care) in the first instance to:- Accident & Emergencies, Northcliffe House, London UK.