In a bid to re-establish authority over the Mafia the Catholic Church has stepped up their terror operations. Bishops Smyth, McCormick and a legion of other hardened exploiters and their lawyers have been asked to take up residence in the local parishes where senior Mafia heads are currently residing. ‘We believe that the power of God’s word lies in the hands of these men’ said Don Francis, head of the Catholics, a notorious faction based in Italy. ‘If we cannot work together in exploiting the local people , if we cannot be friendly about our business and personal interests then we have to take measures into our own hands’ said Don ’Reasonable’ Francis sitting on a solid gold throne at his unshowy operations base in Vatican City. ‘Small things matter to our priests and the forthcoming issues are something they have handled before. We like to strip the matter down to the bare essentials and then come to a satisfactory close. If our bishops with decades of experience don’t put the fear of God into the local parents then we will be forced to call in the fundamentalist evangelicals.’ Experts believe that this probably refers to The Blair Foundation, an extreme ideology which is known to have close ties with The Boss and is known to take extreme action on the flimsiest of excuses in order that justice is established.
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