A jingo of red shirted twats broke a record yesterday - for the fastest onset of impotent nationalistic fury. The embarrassing football fans achieved the record by resorting to singing World War Two songs - just 25 minutes into the England Germany world cup game.
Their stupidity and small mindedness induced button clenching discomfort and irritated tutting, even in a Surbiton pub, one of the hardest arenas in the world in which to find dissent against nationalist showboating.
'Hats off to the lads, they've plumbed the depths in record times,' said a spokesman for the Guinness Book of Embarrassing Records. 'The england players may have let themselves down, but that wasn't enough for this plucky group of drinkers in Surbiton.'