Michael govesworth the educashun secretry hav told everybode he wants to brake the 'Berlin Wall' between state skools and his alma mater st custards which was founded by a mad man in 1836. This could mean mad maths master sigismund arbuthnot geting the chance to weeld the kane at common entrance exams but hav been critisisd becos this might mean state skool oiks could win the mrs joyful prize for rafia work chiz.
'The dominant consensus hem hem has been that state educashun in England is barely satisfactory,' sa govesworth who the teechers say is uterly wet and a weed. 'But now the state system is improving and the image of poor disiplin, low standards and entrenched illitrissy is no longer tenable'.
Govesworth have also saked the head of ofsted lady fotherington-thomas who would skip about skools she was meant to be inspeckting saying hullo trees hullo flowers and who was also a GURL. He hav denied that he will seek to replace hur with one of his chums from st custards.
'They are not avaleable anyway,' sa govesworth 'becos cameron 2 and the skool buly grabber, who is now called george osborne, are both to busy runing the tuck shop which is about to get back orl the money that laber lost as any fule kno.'