The International Bureau of Weights and Measures today announced an eighth unit would be added to the SI bases that dominate commerce and science in the modern world.
Unlike the other seven base units, the new metric will be used within social media to measure the importance of an event by the use of a specific tag or through repeated sharing.
The new unit, defined at 10,000 usages per second, has been the named the #Cyrus, after the infamous event in 2013 where former teen-idol Miley Cyrus and Robin Thicke’s dance at the MTV VMA’s caused a temporary appearance of the dreaded “Fail Whale” on devices around the world. The Whale has since been tagged and released into the wild, where it is said to be thriving.
As such, all news reports using Twitter as a source have been asked by the BIPM to adopt the new unit forthwith. For example, Beyonce’s announcement of her pregnancy now registers 0.8#C, with the current record being set by a transmission of classic Anime film “Castle in the Sky”, where 14#C was generated by watchers tweeting the word “Balse” at a specific moment.
Attempts to break this record in the UK were thwarted when one of the main instigators allowed his spellchecker to change the wording, with the attempt going out as “Ed Balls” and only attracting 1p#C.
Hat tip to rhymenocerous