Latest from Peoples News Agency, Pyongyang. Dec 13 11.29
Rudolph the Red Nosed Running Dog of Imperialist Warmongers and Bourgeois Careerism has been purged from the Elite Peoples Reindeer Cadre. The Dear leader personally told joyful crowds at the Kim Il Sung Memorial Grotto that Rudolph had, under interrogation by State Security, admitted to using his Red Nose as a beacon to guide drone attacks onto the collective farms geared to producing plentiful stocks of nourishing Brussels sprouts. Vigilant citizens had also denounced the traitorous Rudolph as a saboteur after the failed launch of the Nuclear-Powered People's Sleigh, designed, built and piloted by the Heroic Dear Leader. In a completely unrelated development, the Kim Jong-Il Festive Wonderland has announced a freshly arrived consignment of tasty and nutritious Reindeer Burgers.