The Autumn Statement yesterday announced that £718m had been set aside for 'the final solution' and 'exit strategy'.
Upon deeper investigation through an FOI request it was confirmed that all senior advisors had been issued uniforms with an 'SS' stitched onto it, though to stand for 'Senior Staff'. They would also be issued with 'administrative tools' that include a Luger pistol, a list of poor people, and cyanide capsules.
It comes on the same day that huge 'poor camps' were being set up around the country to house disabled, the elderly, and benefit claimants, with Government ministers insisting it was 'a short team measure' and that the camps would only be temporary structures erected on farmland in 10 areas of the country during this Winter to 'help manage the burden on front line services into one manageable solution'.
The Coalition also announced that a new logo had been devised to help sharpen the focus of voters ahead of the election in 2015, and that the design would be an eagle, thought to represent the soaring growth of the country. It would be set atop a mixture of the letters 'T' and 'L' to represent the Tories and Lib Dems, and they would form into 'a sort of cross' tittered a government representative.