Nelson Mandela, the Che Guevara of the middle classes, has died in South Africa, aged 95, after a long battle against a lung infection.
Born in 1918 in a stable in Bethlehem, this unassuming farm boy first shot to fame after joining a group of guerrilla rebels in their fight against the evil Galactic Empire and, in their most desperate hour, he successfully led a daring X-wing mission against the Death Star which resulted in its destruction.
Following this attack, however, he was labelled as a terrorist and arrested. He was subsequently tried and convicted of treason and spent the next 27 years of his life in prison.
During his time in prison, he became close friends with fellow inmate, Morgan Freeman, and ran a successful accountancy business looking after the tax affairs of the prison staff, before developing a vaccine for racism in 1975. It was thanks to Mandela's work in this field that racism has now been globally eradicated, with the last known case occurring in Oldham in 1980. Mandela also worked hard to reform South Africa, and it is thanks to his great efforts in that regard that South Africa is now globally recognised as one of the safest and most law-abiding countries in the world, apart from all the random murders and kidnappings.
In the wake of the takeover of Earth by Krypton's General Zod in the early 1980s there were increasing calls for Mandela's release and he was finally set free in 1990 and managed to defeat the evil Zod and his villainous henchmen, Non and Ursa, in a climactic battle in the Fortress of Solitude at the North Pole.
As the legend of Mandela grew stronger, he was elected President of The High Council of Gallifrey and was personally charged with the protection of the entire universe. In this role, he managed to repeatedly thwart the evil schemes of both the Daleks and the Cybermen but his constant association with various pretty young ladies took its toll on his personal life and he was divorced on at least two separate occasions.
His death has been greeted with shock around the world although his legion of fans have reacted warmly to the announcement that Peter Capaldi will take over as the new Nelson Mandela at Christmas.