Online shopping giant Amazon has announced that their new drone delivery helicopters will be equipped with sophisticated weaponry to 'deal with' customers who take too long browsing on their website without going through to the checkout.
Amazon spokesman, John Reynolds, said, "This is a new frontier in the internet shopping revolution. We have noticed prospective shoppers sometimes take far too long and then even decide not to buy anything. This bewildering behaviour can now be addressed by identifying the culprits and firing a non lethal dart at them. It should slow down the time for the rest of us real shoppers who can be subject to mini seconds of delay because of uneconomic traffic."
In what Glasgow police are insisting is a non related development, an urgent meeting has been requested with Amazon representatives to determine whether their drones were in the Glasgow area last Friday.