A shocking report exposing large Banks as centres of sharp business practices has been published. Other not-so-sharp businesses complained "We thought they were just there to give us the money. Then they asked for it back. The government should do something"
A Government spokesperson replied " Absolutely, this is the unacceptable face of Capitalism, oh sorry that's been done already"
There was widespread anger among the public when asked to express widespread anger on TV. " Bankers, shoot them all, but not till my mortgage approval comes through" was just one reaction from Jeremy in Putney.
Who turned out to be an Estate Agent
Opposition members of parliament sponsored by the Cooperative Bank burst into tears of gratitude as attention wandered away from them.
At an emergency meeting bankers PR spokespeople suggested " Keep calm, it's the power company's turn next week"