Millions of children will wake to disappointment this Christmas day if miserly middle-aged fathers have their way.
According to a survey of 40 to 45 year-old dads, a staggering 95% said they’d like to see a return to the seventies style tightfistedness that once saw them the ungrateful recipients of gifts such as; a homemade go-kart crafted from an old door, some string and shopping trolley wheels that would only go left; a second-hand pair of monkey boots; and for one poor lad an empty shoe box.
Nick Smith, a 43 year-old office worker and self confessed tight-bastard from Kent said: "I’m fed up with the attitude of today’s kids. They expect it all on a plate and haven’t a clue about the concept of working for the hard-earned green stuff. If my kids think that sitting a desk, sending email, answering the occasional phone call and surfing the internet for eight hours a day for my 45 grand a year, just so that I can buy them the latest in touchscreen gadgetry, then they'd better think again. They'll be lucky if they get a selection pack between them this year."
Despite the survey’s findings however, family experts believe that mums will rally in support of their children once they discover their partner’s plans for prudence.
“Oh I’m not too worried about it,” said 38 year-old Debbie Smith, nonchalantly, “I mean given the choice between buying the three boys an ipad each or not getting his annual blow-job on Christmas night, I don’t think the kids have anything to worry about. Do you?