Comprehensive school chemistry teacher Will Woods (45) still can't cook blue crystal meth despite having studied all five series of 'Breaking Bad'.
'I've diligently watched every episode', he says,'several times, in slo-mo and backwards, but I still can't do it. And my mother's getting pissed-off with me using her kitchen as a lab.'
Will, who admits Bromley isn't Albuquerque, is hoping that the upcoming final series will provide the ingredient he needs to escape his tormenting students and his second job at a car wash, but is despondent.
'I can't even get bleedin' lung cancer,' he said.