In his latest overhaul of GCSE's the Secretary for Education, Michael Gove, has added the lyrics of diminutive Canadian Pop sensation Justin Bieber to the GCSE English Syllabus. Alongside the poetry of Wordsworth and the Sonnets of Shakespeare, English students will study such works of Mr Bieber as "Baby" (Baby, baby, baby oooh,Like baby, baby, baby nooo Like baby, baby, baby oooh,I thought you'd always be mine (mine)and "Common Denominator" (I'm gonna hold it down for you /You, whoa, oh, whoa/You're the common denominator/Oh yeah whoa).
The latest move by Gove fuels rumours already prevalent in Westminster that he has, for some time, been a "Belieber", one of Biebers hardcore, sometimes fanatical fans. Announcing the syllabus changes at a Press Conference at the Department of Education, Mr Gove told reporters "Justin's like so...oh my god...he's, like so cool....and his lyrics are like just so deep. Like, have you listened to "First Dance". It's like he's, you know, reaching out to me. I just cry every time. And he's like....so toned. I touched one of his abs at the O2 and it was like...you know....so firm."
When it was suggested by a senior correspondent from the Times Educational Supplement that Mr Bieber's work was anodyne, characterless, factory pop and that Mr Bieber cynically capitalised on his image to attract the buying power of white, middle-class , pre-pubescent girls, Mr Gove's lower lip began to quiver and he called the TES Correspondent a "Big old meanie" before running, crying from the room.
Mr Gove was later reported to be locked in his office, listening to Mr Bieber's "Runaway Love" and making a collage of pictures of himself and Mr Bieber in a heart formation beneath the legend MIKE + JUSTIN 4 EVA XXX.