In the latest arrest of a well known celebrity from 70s light entertainment, Officers involved in the Operation Yewtree investigation last night confirmed the arrest of a 68 year old man described as “a self-employed miller” at an address in Camberwick Green, Trumptonshire.
The man, as yet unnamed, but described by a Big Friendly Policeman (PC McGarry number 452) as “sharper than a thorn” and “spry and nimble when he grinds the corn” was being held last night at Chigley Central Police Station after a short ride in an umpety bumpety Police Car
Locals are reported as being “Shocked” by the arrest, although pharmacist’s wife Mrs Honeyman told reporters “I’m not surpised. He’s been living up there at that Mill on his own for years. And that smock? What’s that all about? And have you looked at his hair? Remind you of anyone? I’m just saying. And that fort. All those young men up there with that Captain Snort. It’s not natural. And all these Poles moving into the high street. I’m voting UKIP next time, I tell you.”
However, other local residents were not as convinced. Town postman Peter Hazel said last night “Hard to see what they’re all getting worked up about. I mean, nobody round here’s got any genitals.”