A NewsBiscuit correspondent who cannot be named for legal reasons has tearfully confessed, during a specially convened press conference last night, that a ticker submitted by him was not original but had been inspired by joke no. 88 on page 20 of The Beano published 26th October 2013.
Sobbing uncontrollably, the contributor admitted that following this digrace, his wife and family had left him, he had lost his home, had become a drunk and a drug addict and was currently living on the streets.
"I have had my MBE, my Nobel prize for literature, my peerage and all my Olympic gold medals taken back" he confessed "and while I am lying in the gutter, passing policemen kick me contemtuously and call me a 'pleb'. My life is just one empty sea of pointless, bleak despair and blackness."
Perhaps most worryingly of all, the Prime Minister has now also expressed his "full confidence" in him.