An investigation into NHS practices surrounding the late Jimmy Savile has revealed that his blood may have been used in up to thirty separate transfusions, sometimes being given to girls as young as eight.
Angry parents today swarmed round the hospital alleged to be at the centre of the scandal, demanding that Savile be removed from their children immediately.
"My girl was always a little angel when she was younger," said one parent, who did not wish to be identified. "But, when she turned fifteen, she started smoking, like Jimmy Savile used to do. I just know that it was his blood in her that made her do that. It's all the fault of that transfusion, so it's no wonder that she had that unwanted pregnancy and failed her exams and all."
Experts have, however, rushed to defend the hospital. "It would have been impossible for them to have realised the implications of using his blood in transfusions back in the 1970s," said Professor Arthur Rutherford, of the Cellular and Sub-Atomic Disease Research Centre. "I mean, it is only in the last few years that we have been able to identify people like Savile due to the high concentration of "paedons" in their blood. These paedons are long-living sub-atomic particles which are attracted to much shorter lived particles like bosons, mesons and kidons for reasons that we still don't fully understand. If we had run been able to run tests for these sorts of particles in the 1970s, then this whole situation could have been avoided."
Although the hospital has offered to send blood samples from suspected infected children to the CERN facility in Switzerland to test for the presence of paedons in their blood, many parents remain upset that Savile could be continuing to abuse their children on a sub-atomic level from beyond the grave.
"It's an absolute disgrace that the hospital didn't spot that his blood shouldn't have been used," said Mary McLoughlin, the watchful head of the local Save Our Children group. "If there's one thing I know, it's that paedophiles have radioactive green coloured blood, not like you and me. Well, not like me, anyway," she added, suspiciously.