A "relationship support" meeting booked by 'Miss Lovelace', Mitzi, Daphne and Lulu, at the village hall has been cancelled amid fears that it was being used as a bondage workshop. The move comes just weeks after the publication of the controversial book, "50 Shades of Candlewick Green". There are also fears that the daily Chigley biscuit factory dance could just be an elaborate cover for an open air orgy, after regular dogging sessions were found to be taking place in Poggles Wood. The shocking revelation comes just weeks after Caption Snort, the Officer in charge of Pippin Fort was arrested for suspected substance abuse.
Trumpton Village Hall booked for bondage workshop
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It's a waste of tme because nobody reads the fucking news around here
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