Often ignored and unfairly represented by the western media, the continent of Africa has always relied on the front man for The Boomtown Rats to champion their cause. A spokesman for UNICEF declared: 'Nations ravaged by civil war, colonialism, social inequality and disease need, more than anything, one unwashed Irishmen 100km above the Earth.'
Bowing to pressure from the peoples of Africa, Mr.Geldof has agreed to selflessly pay £64,000 for a seat onboard a commercial space flight. 'What could be more inspirational for child dying of aids,' announced the Space Expedition Corporation (SXC). 'Than to know that 'I Don't Like Mondays' is playing in zero gravity?'
For many charity workers there has been a growing sense that the £150 million of famine relief raised by Live Aid would have been better spent on 23 round trips to into space. Fortunately Mr Geldof's fellow passengers have invested in this once in a life time opportunity rather than the frivolously providing 640,000 families with safe water for a year, ten years of schooling for 328,000 children or immunisation for 91 million children. 'And who would begrudge Sir Bob the occasional tax evasion and personal fortune running into tens of millions?' asked the UNICEF spokesman. 'And I'm sure Africa would happily have a whip-round to fund a one man, solar rocket for Bono'.