In a boost to the self-esteem of women in Britain, up to one third of women in a recent survey admit to being happy with their lives. These women do not want to emigrate, get a new job, a new hairstyle or a boob job. This group of 'happy' women seem to be content to "get on with their lives" and are "pleased not to have had to grow up when grandma did".
Discontented women's groups are mortified. Women Who Want More spokesperson Jasmine Hancock: "What on earth are these women thinking? They must be on drugs or something. Who do they think they are being happy with what they've got when they could be miserable about not spending three months in the Bahamas each year or not being married to Wayne Rooney?"
However, when one of these so-called 'happy' women, Sharon Edgerton, was asked to explain why she wasn't miserable like the majority she explained: "Well I just think that I am lucky enough to be living in a first world nation, I'll never go hungry, I've got a roof over my head and all the labour-saving devices I could possibly need. What is there to complain about? I could be living in Afghanistan or Burma."
Ms Hancock was quick to rebut this argument "I mean what's there to be happy about? At least in Afghanistan a burqa doesn't make your arse look big"