Mrs Mary Potts, mother of Abigail Potts, has warned parents to be on watch for excessive celebrations associated with 'A' Level success this week as her own child is still levitating from last year's results.
Mrs Potts says that it all began last August when the local paper asked Abigail, along with three of her other blonde, long-haired chums, to jump into the air in jubilation at their mutual 'straight A's'. As all of Abigail's friends returned to terra firma, they were shocked to see Abigail remain suspended in mid-air and become increasingly distraught at her own predicament. In the months that followed, and as he friends took up their University offers, Abigail found herself alone and increasingly isolated. Eventually, her Sixth-Form college fenced her off from view in case other students deliberately underperformed to best avoid Abigail's affliction.
Mrs Potts says that after a succession of referrals to a range of specialists, Abigail felt that the best course of action was to resit her 'A' Levels with the Welsh Board and take English, Media and Sociology instead of Maths and Science. She is hoping after last year's marking fiasco, a set of straight D grades should be enough to bring her back to earth.