The EU is urging stricter regulation on childrens petting zoos specializing in flesh eating viruses and bacteria after a string of infections.
Sally Macdonald contracted a rare strain of necrotizing fasciitis last year after she was allowed to stroke and feed a culture Streptococcous Pyogenes on a school trip, and there have been further cases of suspected ebola in other visitors.
Bill Sampson, owner of Sunnyside Viral and Bacterial Petting Farm, commented "In all the years I've been allowing children to handle petri dishes full of live culture I've had no problems. Yet only now after 16 deaths and numerous cases of admittance to quarantine wards do the EU step in and want regulation. That's Euro Beaurocracy for you".