After several days in hiding Lord Sugar has emerged completely wrinkle free following an intensive botox course courtesy of Apprentice 2013 winner Dr Leah Totten.
The new look multi-millionaire was spotted purchasing an expensive moisturiser cream at the Laboratoire Garnier counter in Harrods where surprised sales staff mistook him for Johnny Depp.
“I was completely gobsmacked,” said counter assistant Maisie Lipido “With all his wrinkles ironed out he’s a complete drink on a stick. Who’d have thought a terrapin-face like that could be transformed into such a sexy looking heart throb. He's a real old smoothy now.”
Mobs of screaming women had to be fought off as the noble Lord made his way out of the store to his waiting limo. One fan who managed to get past security guards planted a kiss on her quarry’s cheek. “It was all soft, like kissing a baby’s bottom except it wasn’t spouting shit like on the Apprentice.”
Top Apprentice totty, Dr Totten said, “I’m not saying that Lord Sugar chose me for any other reason than that I am an astute business woman. But after needling me for weeks on the Show he insisted I worked on him to make him even more handsome. The guys in the office have since dubbed me Dr Tottenstein and begged me to sort Igor out next, but Karen’s having none of it.”
Lord Sugar, who has been criticised about the ethical responsibility of taking on a cosmetic surgeon as part of his business portfolio said, “Being surrounded by nubile young women and handsome young guys has had no bearing on my decision to employ Leah or undergo Botox treatment. I could have had a simple comb over like Donald Trump if I’d really wanted to look drop dead gorgeous.”
Rumours that the next series of the Apprentice will include a brain surgeon, psychoanalyst and a US whistle seller/blower are as yet unconfirmed.