The British government today said it expects UK ISPs to supplant all online crticism of ‘child porn man’ David Cameron with selected Tory party political broadcasts.
The plan, codenamed ‘Web Cam’, will become law next Monday, with heavy penalties for non-compliance.
Leading ISPs responded by saying from now on they will be replacing Mr Cameron’s face with a photo of Ray Alan’s famous boozy toff ventriloquist dummy Lord Charles.
As the brinkmanship intensified, Dave was heard to mutter: “I could really do with a gottle of geer.”
A few bottles of beer later he announced ballot forms would default to the Tory party from the next General Election, unless voters turned up at polling stations and opted for another party.