There were scenes of panic at a Buckingham Palace garden party today, when a naked woman streaked across the lawn to the receiving line where the Queen and Prince Philip were greeting guests.
People scattered in alarm as two police officers made chase and she was within a few yards of the Queen when Prince Harry, who had been standing behind his grandparents, threw himself on top of the woman and brought her down.
A guest who was in the receiving line said; “Harry’s military training really kicked in and it wasn’t as if she was a small woman, she had the biggest knockers I’ve ever seen. God knows how she managed to run so fast with them flapping about, but at least Harry had a soft landing”. Another eyewitness remarked on the Queen’s remarkably calm demeanour “She just stepped over the woman and carried on shaking hands as if nothing had happened, while Prince Philip joked that he hadn’t seen tits like that since he visited Western Samoa”
The streaker, since identified as Mrs Huffington-Price, 65, was seen by other guests to disrobe in the tea tent. Marjorie Marigold, 48, who was serving at the time said; “At first I thought she was just taking her cardigan off, but when she stepped out of her dress I realised that something wasn’t quite right. The elderly gentleman who was with her tried to intervene, but she threw a shoe at him and called him a philandering old goat. It was terrifying, there were people screaming and knocking over tables. One lady fainted and had to be revived with sugary tea and a slice of Madeira cake”
Mrs Huffington -Price was taken to Paddington Police station for further questioning. Her daughter Georgina, 32, speaking later from the £2.5M parental home in Surrey said “Mummy hasn’t been herself, since she caught Daddy shagging the gardener. It’s not that she’s snobbish or anything, but he isn’t even English, the gardener that is not Daddy”. Mr Huffington Price, 75, wasn’t available for comment.
Following the incident the Prime Minister called for an urgent review of security procedures at palace garden parties. “If it hadn’t been for the selfless bravery of Prince Harry, I dread to think what might have happened the Queen isn’t as young as she was”.