Khalid Sheikh Mohammed the terrorist who famously admitted to being the mastermind behind the 911 attacks on the US in September 2001, from a cave in Afghanistan, has applied for a US patent on a new design of water-board for the CIAs enhanced interrogation techniques. Mohammed who was water-boarded 183 times by the CIA said "quite frankly I was getting so utterly bored with the essentially bland drowning experience after the 183rd time that I started to imagine how to make the technique actually work. The new technique can not be disclosed in its entirety, however it is believed to still involve inversion under water, but at the same time being subjected to repeats of Jamie Oliver cooking programmes with Justin Beiber playing through headphones. A Pentagon spokesperson stated "The new technique is seen as a key necessity in safeguarding our great country and will be implemented in all our secret prisons in defense of freedom"
Khalid Sheikh Mohammed designs new waterboard for CIA
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