Despite evidence from the goverment's own advisors, the Advisory Council on Self Abuse, whose reaearch suggests that hardly any cases of blindness and insanity can be directly attributed to masturbation, the Home Secretary says "legalising self-abuse would send the wrong message to young people. Everyone knows that this activity can cause civil disorder, terrorism and hair to grow on the back of your hands. It is also wicked and sinful, and worst of all, the perpetrators allegedly enjoy it so of course we need to outlaw it."
Teresa May To Classify Masturbation As Class C Drug
(4 posts) (4 voices)
You're on a roll today. I like a bit of light relief myself.
I've always thought it was a third rate govt. Now I know it's a 'class C' one as well...
In Catholic schools it causes severe eye conditions leading to blindness
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