http://www.newsbiscuit.com/2013/06/25/creationist-school-appears-out-of-nowhere/
Quick links: NewsBiscuit Home • Chat Room • Writers' Room • Top Ten
Love this archive piece today.
(13 posts) (6 voices)
-
Titus
offlineMemberAgree. It is an all-time classic.
Not only is the inherent idea witty, but all the jokes and subtle references are good as well - everything, all the way through from the Ussher dedication at the start to the rejection of selecton at the end.
(Who wrote it?)
Posted 8 months ago # -
blacklesbian
offlineMemberAgree brilliant. I love this subject. However if it was really a creationist school it would have taken 7 days to build (including rest day).
Why hasn't Dawkins received a knighthood yet? They have already missed the chance with Hitch. I think I will start a campaign. Please support.
Posted 8 months ago # -
Titus
offlineMemberI think Dawkins slightly misses the point. By attacking religion so vociferously, he indicates that he takes the subject seriously.
Most of us atheists, however, regard religion as not only nonsense but a matter of supreme irrelevance, on a par with alien abduction and conspiracy theories.
However, if a belief in it (like a belief in Father Christmas, Marxism or the Tooth Fairy) make some people happy, good luck to them.
Religion is fine provided you don't ever make the mistake of taking it seriously or actually believing any of it.
Posted 8 months ago # -
Spartacus
offlineMemberI think the major difference is that people who claim to have been victims of alien abduction don't tend to kill other people who claim to have been victims of abduction by different aliens, in the name of the aliens they claim to have been abducted by. Or be quite such massive hypocrites.
Posted 8 months ago # -
Stan Laurel
offlineMemberTitus - written by Ludicity, one of the finest writers ever to grace NB. Check him out on Writer of the Month etc.
Posted 8 months ago # -
Lindy Moone
offlineMemberPraise FOAD for posting this. Great story. Count me among the fossil-chuckers.
@blacklesbian: Can't agree that it would have taken 7 days to build the school. He had a set, Magnificent Schedule, at least to start with, didn't He? The School must have been one of His little Afterthoughts, since He hadn't considered letting Adam and Eve get broody from the Almighty Get-Go...
Or possibly the school was a Celestial Clearing-of-the-Throat, Divine Fart or Heavenly Hiccough.
Not sure Dawkins could ever get a knighthood, but I'd love to see that. Isn't the Queen the official head of the church? Or doesn't that matter, since so many other things about it make no sense anyway?
Wish I could believe that religion is 'not only nonsense but a matter of supreme irrelevance', but everything going on in the States tells me otherwise. (Not to mention here in Turkey. Oops, mentioned it.) I agree with Dawkins, that it's dangerous in even the most well-meaning hands.
Posted 8 months ago # -
FOAD
offlineMemberI don't think people should be banned from having an imaginary friend, if it makes them happy.
That’s what I tell my shrink. He says I should persuade other people to believe in Tharg; 20-30 gets me a cult, a few hundred and I’ve got my own religion, with state funding for a school or two and representatives in the Lords.Posted 8 months ago # -
Lindy Moone
offlineMemberAnd then Tharg tells Koala, my imaginary friend, that she can no longer sell her 'Thongs of Praise' at church, and Koala's mum bashes Tharg over the head both literally and figuratively with the Bible... and makes him sit in the corner reading her series of 'Pubic Service Announcements'...
P.S. I don't think imaginary friends can or should be banned. I think they should be banned from taking part in politics, from teaching kids in public schools that Grog rode a Triceratops, and from deciding what we can or can't do with our lady and gentleman parts.
Posted 8 months ago # -
Titus
offlineMemberMy friend Arthur the Slug (no, not that Arthur, Arthur the slug) agrees, but reminds me that the Bible is well dodgy as a source of authority, being only written by men and not by imaginary slugs.
Being a hermaphrodite, he has his own views on the acceptability of various sexual activities.
Unfortunately he also demands that his followers declare death to all invisible pink unicorns, who he says make a mockery of the whole idea of religion.
Posted 8 months ago # -
Lindy Moone
offlineMemberOh, I don't know. Unicorns are mentioned many times in the Bible. It doesn't specify what they looked like. They could be that pale, pale shade of pink known as "invisible pink". They could also eat Flying Spaghetti Monsters...
Posted 8 months ago # -
Titus
offlineMemberPerhaps we need a word to define all those who decline to believe in the Flying Spaghetti Monster so that we can denounce them and condemn them to death. Could we call them "impastas" or something?
Much of religion seems to consist of denouncing that which you do not believe in. A one-time girlfriend and I got on fine, once we realised and accepted the fact that the difference between us was that she was a Catholic atheist and I was an Anglican atheist - we had each rejected different religions.
Posted 8 months ago #
Reply
You must log in to post.