In the latest move to uncover radical extremists Popeye has been recruited by MI5 to help deal with the growing terrorist threat to the UK.
The popular former Sailor Man was chosen for his uncanny ability to come up with solutions to problems that the police and MI5 have so far found insurmountable.
A spokesman for MI5 said, “Popeye is the perfect candidate for the job. His ‘can-do’ approach is exactly what we have been looking for, someone who’ll just roll their sleeves up and knock seven shades of excrement out of anyone posing a threat to our national security.”
Popeye’s first task will be to seek out terrorist cells operating in selected towns and cities across the UK. However there has been criticism that he will be easily recognised by his white sailor’s hat, anchor tattoos and trademark pipe.
Popeye leapt to his own defence at a recent top secret press conference arranged by MI5 at the Premier Inn, Cheltenham. Cracking open a can of spinach, before delivering a right hook to BBC political correspondent Nick Robinson to a loud round of applause, he said, “Well blow me down you ungrateful Limeys! I yam what I yam, an’ I yain’t gonna be satchisfied till I’ve sweeped them pesky plotters down a scupper. Ak ak ak ak ak...”
Support for his appointment has been received from many quarters including London Mayor, Boris Johnson. “I’ve long been a fan of Popeye and his attractive girlfriend Olive Oil (to which I say there is no truth in the rumours). The combination of his Herculean strength and his Aristotelian diplomatic skills provide a cast iron guarantee that we can defeat terrorism and achieve world peace.”
MI5 has denied that Popeye will be living in a caravan during his time in the UK and instead will be at a secret address at 5 Kingston Road, East Cheam in the borough of Sutton.