Scotland Yard has admitted that the police simply don't have the resources to track suspects, unless they move into showbiz, newspaper journalism or the CID.
"There's not much we can do," said an automated desk sergeant, when we rang Scotland Yard's new premium rate service 0906 ItMightBeNothingBut. On the other hand, callers to one of its new freephone number, such as 0800 Shop A Cop, are immediately put through to the head of special investigations.
Yesterday, Scotland Yard's Chief Commissioner was unavailable for comment. He was thought to be in Australia, on a fact finding tour of Rolf Harris's old haunts, in a five star hotel near Bondi Beach.
Scotland Yard denied it has misused its resources. "We take terrorism very seriously indeed," said the answering machine, "this mailbox is full. Now hang up."