UKIP leader Nigel Farage today responded savagely to Tory accusations of UKIP members being ‘fruit cakes’ by labelling them ‘a bunch of dithering cream puffs and donuts’.
“Lord Snooty Cameron takes the biscuit” joked Mr Farage “his government’s way of dealing with terrorist rabble-rouser Abu Qatada is to put him up in a posh house with 24 hour security costing £100,000 a week.”
Mr Cameron responded: “Look, UKIP only got 23% of the vote the other day, showing their loony voters are jolly well totally out of touch with the other 77% of decent hardworking British voters, what what?”
“I tell you, what the British public wants is an elite of incompetent posh public schoolboys to tell the ignorant pleb and peasant hordes what to do.”
To prove his point, Mr Cameron promptly hired another 50 Old Etonians as Tory policy advisors.
One voter said: “As far as I can see, all these posh boys are good at is walking around with their noses in the air and talking to each other in Latin. My advice to them is ‘Futue te ipsum, matris futuor!’. It’s the only language they understand.”