Recent DNA testing into the nutritional benefits of raisins has led to the discovery of some startling information regarding the dried fruits origin. For many years raisins were thought to be dried grapes or at the very least small sultanas but the findings have put this definition into serious doubt.
The structural helix dissemination of the fruits genetic loop-print shows the fruit to have more in common with a dinosaur bone than a grape. The research also showed the raisin to have a 15% horse-meat content but this is thought to have been injected at a later stage in order to give the raisin its marketable sugary shine which is similar in its genetic structure to a thoroughbreds shiny mane.
It has long been assumed that over time when a grape dries it gradually raisinizes but it seems no one has ever stuck around to observe the process come to fruition. Using stop-motion filming techniques similar to those used by the late Tony Hart to animate Morph, experts discovered the grapes simply decomposed and did not become shiny raisins as expected.
Further testing into the supposed genetic structure found striking DNA similarities to that of fossilized dinosaur remains. There are varied hypothesizes into the new found origins, the front-runner at the moment being they are small dinosaur droppings which have evaded decomposition or fossilization due to an inherent twisted shard of genetic re-verb. Experts are still puzzled as to how they are often found so close to rotting grapes but at this stage are putting it down to coincidence.
Further testing needs to take place before raisins are officially re-classified but according to Hollywood rumour the next Jurassic Park installment will be portrayed from a Raisins perspective.