Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne is unlikely to rise from the dead over the Easter holiday according to reports.
Osborne, who died after suffering a series of failed budgets, had been looking pasty for some years say close friends.
'George just gave up when he realized he couldn't breathe life back into the economy,' said a friend. 'He probably died heartbroken when he was told he'd never be prime minister and that his disciples had deserted him.'
Speculation that Osborne might miraculously make a comeback after Easter has been dismissed by Biblical scholars who point that the last person to rise from the dead didn't have a reputation for screwing the poor or despising the sick and the disabled.