The influence of animal rights campaigners became evident today as the government announced plans to forcibly replace animals in science experiment labs with unemployed smokers, drinkers and drug users.
Despite huge revenues from smoking and drinking, David Cameron and George Osborne believe ‘a healthier Britain will be a wealthier Britain’ and it is important to remind the young smoking, drinking and drugs are not healthy.
When informed fags, booze and drugs would be totally free, millions of long-term unemployed applied to join the program.
As part of the new initiative, to try to deter the young from starting smoking, the SAS are to secretly assassinate any ‘celebrity’ publicly photographed smoking, drinking or taking drugs.
One of the released greyhounds said: “I’ll have a pint of Pedigree, chum.”