Reports that North Korea is enhancing its stockpile of hair cuts by launching its own David Beckham hairstyle has sent shock waves through hairdressing salons right across the Western world.
The reclusive state has long been known to secrete stores of about thirty 'Let us trim our hair in accordance with Socialist lifestyle' hairstyles for men and women, but none are believed by hairstyle analysts capable of reaching the West.
'Only George Osborne in the West wears a North Korean hairdo,' said a respected hairstyle analyst.
Pyongyang's threat was yesterday denounced at an emergency meeting of the National Hairdressers' Federation in London as 'hair raising'.
'If North Korea goes ahead with its version of a David Beckham cut,' said Dr John Barber,'it will completely finish us. There's no way we can compete with North Korean coiffure. To crown it all, nobody will come near us, even for just a trim. It's the equivalent of a nuclear strike on the West's hairdressing infrastructure and will bomb us back into the short back and sides age.
'It's all rather mirroring.'
Accusations by the West that the hermit state has been stepping-up its 'hair wars' offensive by importing large quantities of heavy hair gel, have been brushed aside by Pyongyang.
'For some time the North Koreans have been manufacturing a new breed of styling scissors and combs,'said hairstyle analyst Michael Partington.'It's inconceivable that these are for use with existing North Korean hairdos. In my opinion, they are pretty close to developing a Vidal Sassoon capability.'
Mr Partington believes that the David Beckham threat is merely a fringe activity, with a more serious development in the offing.
'Spy satellite and swept-back wing drone surveillance has revealed increased activity around Pyongyang's hair salons,' he said. 'I think the North Koreans are working on something really big, quite possibly an Amy Winehouse Beehive. Now, that really should make your hair stand on end, and probably fall out.'