RCA student Winnie Miller, funded by Kingston upon Hull based Armitage Shanks, to investigate ‘the propellant effects of flatulence during defecation’, was informed yesterday, after her rather drawn out post-viva tidy-up, that she has now been awarded her Doctorate.
Winnie described how she used a mixture of interview techniques and CSI style forensic methods in toilet cubicles to inform her work. One of her contributions has been the development of some new terminology, which she hopes may one day find its way into the English dictionary. Example terms included: Ego-Shit, which refers to the little shit that makes a big splash; and the Tsunami, which refers to the rare case of flatulent diarrhoea which forces it way up the bowl and under the seat to leave tide marks on the wall, and between the legs to leave a ‘genitals shadow’ on the back of the door.
When asked whether she worried that future employers might not take her PhD seriously she explained that in the five years it has taken to complete her full-time programme, she has been the butt of a constant barrage of jokes but has learned to take the shit on the chin, like her nick name Winnie the Poo, and questions like ‘Ever worried that your research might be going down the pan?’ and ‘How’s life at the Royal Collage O’Farts?’