The Chancellor has today astounded critics by proposing that the City of Liverpool is to be forcibly given independence from the UK. He further announced the construction of a 20 mile wall in the North West of England.
In his annual budget speech, George Osborne justified this bold proposal to revive the UK economy by explaining that unemployment would drop by 165,000 at a stroke, complemented by 40,000 vacancies in the construction and security sectors to establish and maintain the border.
Osborne explained that the Home Office were particularly pleased, as the Police could achieve their targets without further cuts.
He noted that the loss of Liverpool’s comedians, such as Ken Dodd & John Bishop, and the self-reported musical heritage, would be a small, but necessary sacrifice.
Visitors to Liverpool would be given until 31 March to leave.
The Opposition Leader, currently Ed Miliband, accused the Chancellor of doing this just to get popular support, and he would support the proposal only if Newcastle was included in the plan.