Marijuana-scented scratch-and-sniff cards which were posted to households across the country in a bid to help householders recognise neighbouring illegal cannabis farms actually make excellent roaches for joints.
A Crimestoppers spokesman said, "These cards are supposed to help ordinary people recognise the smell of cannabis and report home farms to police through the number which is included on the card."
Jessie Pinkman of Dundee said, "Aye, we got one the other night, or was it today. Fuck knows! Anyway, I remember because we probably had enough skins to do us until morning but they were loose, the packet was torn to f**k, so there was no roach material left. We'd just used the boy's school attendance card to make the last one and she was driving me nuts to build a fatty. So, I waited for Family Guy to end and went to head to the garage when I spotted this card behind the door.
"I thought it was a lottery card coz it had one of those scratch things and my old doll sticks them through the door now and again but I couldn't fucking get my head round it. There was only one plant behind the foil, I told the missus that on any card you have to match three plants to win so we decided the thing was fucked and tore it up for roaches.
"It saved me a trip to the garage though and I got about twenty shit hot roaches out of it, smelt fucking amazing too."