The Department of Health was called in to asses a recent arrival to the UK after reports of strange behaviour. Peter Hallett, 22, who arrived in London from Melbourne, Australia, last Tuesday was heard muttering positive things about his home for the next two years, including the English weather.
With reports that the weather “wasn’t as bad as everyone makes out” and that “it hasn’t rained that much”, Hallett’s strange comments have certainly been successful in ostracising him from London’s backpacker community.
"In fact” claimed Department of Health spokesperson Ronald Smith, “he’s been here almost a week and hasn’t complained once. We’re normally able to weed out the people with mental health issues during the visa application process, but clearly this one slipped through the net. We’ve taken him into custody so he’s no longer a threat to himself or the community”.
Alarm bells were first raised after Hallett visited Savills Real Estate in North London looking for a place to rent in an area that “wasn’t full of Australian backpackers”.
“As soon as I heard that I knew the poor sod was not in his right mind. I knew the right thing to do was to call the Department of Health to have him committed” said Mary Johnston, chief real estate agent at Savills “my grandmother suffered from dementia and was always going around saying odd things like that.”
To test his mental state, a team of psychiatrists took Hallett on a day trip to Brighton beach to see his reaction. “Using terminology often heard from Australians when visiting an English beach, we asked him whether he found the beach ‘depressing’. Surprisingly he claimed he didn’t, in fact he quite liked it.” said Dr. John Templeton, chief psychiatrist.
When further pressed about on the subject he reportedly replied “you’ve obviously never been to Melbourne.”
