As Pope Benedict prepares to hand in his cassock and keys to the popemobile next week Vatican officials have reveled that the soon to be ex-pontiff will not loose his special infalabillity powers overnignt.
Speaking to reporters Cardinal Palo Marea told journalists how his depopeification will pan out, "To start off he will be falable on weekends on only, but this means he will be have to be careful knocking back the communion wine in the Martyr & Cross pub". Then the Pope will have his infalabillty reduced to Mondays, Wednesday & Fridays, Cardinal Marea laughed to reporters,"Ill Papa was a big fan of Edward Heath, you know both eligable batchelors together, so we thought we would let him experience a typical British 3 day week of the 1970's, we may even switch his lights off in the convent randomly for a gigle"
Penultimately the Pope only be infalable on Mondays, "After a weekends filled heavy partying and praying and saying thing he shouldn't probably, on things like Femail Priests, Gay Marriage or the Third Reich, we feel he may need a get of jail card on a Monday", Marea commented.
Finally Pope Benedict who has chosen the name Cardinal Brooklyn Cruz Romero for his retirement will return to a life full of guilt and blame and may take the honourary position of moral advisor to Silvo Bellusconi.
Reports of the Pope finding upcomming retirement have been circulating and the Vatican have been having to deal with rumours that the Pope has tried to post his Papal ring to cash 4 gold to buy a drum kit, this in turn has fueled speculation that he is to form a Paul McCartney tribute band with Archbishops Rowan Williams and George Carey Called "Heavenly Wings"