GiftsForTheWife.com admitted to shareholders in a statement yesterday that the availability of private browsing functions on Microsoft Explorer, the most widely-used internet browser, had failed to lead to a boost in sales, and that they would be forced to scale back their distribution network and reduce staff as a result, only months after confident forecasts of expansion and increased profits were issued.
"Despite the very specific scenario of a man wishing to surprise his wife with a gift bought online (without his browsing history spoiling it all) being heavily featured in Microsoft's advertising campaign for Windows 8, there has been no noticeable increase in sales or traffic on GiftsForTheWife.com", the statement read.
When contacted for comment, CEO and founder of GiftsForTheWife.com, Lisa Noonan said, "we had always thought that the husbands of Britain had held back from buying presents from sites like GiftsForTheWife.com because of the tell-tale browsing history ruining the romance of the gesture. It's what my own husband said, and what so many of my friends and acquaintances told me.
"When we heard that Microsoft would target this very issue in a heavily rotated TV campaign, we were thrilled, and even a little daunted at the prospect of the wave of new business we thought this would bring."
When asked why she thought the widespread awareness of private browsing had failed to have an impact on on-line gift-buying among spouses, Noonan said that it was too early to tell, but that "many men have pointed that they would also like a credit card where the statements went to a separate address or something, so that the joy of gift-giving to ones wife isn't undermined by the bill tipping their wives off.".
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GiftsForTheWife.com still waiting for Private Browsing Boost
(9 posts) (8 voices)
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Posted 7 years ago #
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Yes, well done Golgo13. That Microsoft ad gets drowned out in our house by shouts of "It's for porn!"
It's not helped by the fact that the bloke on the ad looks so shifty.
And, seriously, killing the humour stone dead - why does someone who snoops through their partner's browsing history deserve a gift anyway?
Oh, stars. Have some.
Posted 7 years ago # -
Lovely, lovely sub Golgo 13. Are the other 12 of you as talented?
Posted 7 years ago #
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