Wedgwood, the leading makers of Royal memorabilia say they will be rushing out a range of products to commemorate the Queen’s recent stay in hospital.
The high quality merchandise will include such items as a plate with a picture of the Queen siting on a lavatory taking a shit, a pottery mug with a picture of the Queen barfing into a toilet bowl and a commemorative linen towel that comes already infected with its own norovirus.
Royal Mail say they will also be commemorating the Queen’s recent bout of diaorhea with a range of stamps showing the monarch taking a shit on toilets throughout the Commonwealth during her long and illustrious reign.
Makers of soft toilet tissue Andrex say they would also be interested in celebrating the Queen’s loose bowel movement and plans are already underway for a special edition toilet roll that comes with just one piece of tissue left on the roll
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Bottled water giants Perrier have welcomed the idea and will be introducing a sparkling bottled mineral water -the ‘Canute‘ - in memory of a previous monarch who had similar problems holding back the waters but also ended up with shitty effluent swirling all over his legs
A palace spokesthingy assured well-wishers that there was nothing much wrong with the Queen and the unnecessary spending of tens of thousands of tax payers money was just a precaution.
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Royal Mint to issue special coin to commemorate Queen bowel movement
(5 posts) (5 voices)
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Gerontius
offlineMemberPosted 2 months ago # -
rickwestwell
offlineMemberFantastic! Any way you can pad it out into an FP?
Posted 2 months ago # -
Stan Laurel
offlineMemberThe 'Royal Flush' range of porcelane?
Posted 2 months ago # -
Dick Everyman
offlineMemberDon't know if this is just Australian folklore but there's supposed to be a bar in Sydney which has one of the Queen's turds preserved in a bottle of formaldehide on display as a Shit in an Bottle.
Its provenance dates back to when the Royal yacht docked in Sydney harbour, don't know whether it would be worth anything nowadays, but to the right collector who knows.
Oh, and nice Sub by the way! ;0)
Posted 2 months ago #
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