Nick Clegg has regrettably admitted that he could have acted sooner after receiving a revealing email four years ago. Lambasted this week for 'playing dumb' after strongly denying claims he could have circumnavigated any trouble by acting on the email immediately, Clegg has been forced to confess that the email, from an unknown sender, contained sensitive material about inappropriate treatment of the economy, and that he could have helped the economy grow in just weeks.
'Is your country feeling under appreciated? You too can satisfy her needs with this economy enlarging method', claimed the email, the contents of which were divulged this morning.
Although Clegg maintains he never got to read the email as it was placed straight in his junk folder, he does admit that if he had a more advanced filter in place, he could have forwarded it on to the Chancellor, who could have benefited from the enhancement tips.
'The country has been underwhelmed by the Chancellor's performance', according to a recent broadcast by Channel 4 on the state of the economy, with 'the disappointing size and perpetually slow growth being major factors.'
'Although we did not expect the Chancellor to last so long in his current position, it is a shame he has not been more effective. He has had a few ups and downs, but has really struggled to get on top, and should perhaps consider taking up a new position. For the mean time, he should act on the email's advice; anything to improve his technique would be a boon.'
Although the Chancellor's choice budgeting in public waste management has led to streets being 'cleaner than clean', several members of the public have complained street-cleaners have been overzealous in 'brushing where we don't want them to brush.'
Clegg last night admitted, 'It is true, I had concerns over the treatment of the economy and poor budgeting, but was unaware of the specific claims made, regarding, for instance, the brushing incidents. I have spoken to George about the inappropriate handling of the matter, and we are adamant there will be no further instances of brushing in unwanted areas.'