Another major brand has found itself embroiled in controversy as the investigation into horse-products in the food chain continues to deepen.
The latest product to be associated with the scandal is Blue Nun wine, with tests carried out by Government health inspectors showing that as much as 92% of what consumers believe to be wine is, in fact, horse urine. The remaining 8% was found to be a mixture of brake fluid, meths and anti-freeze, with only trace amount of grapes and other organic and non-lethal material.
The wine has divided opinion since first coming to popularity in the 1970s. It has been described as "a subtle and delicate interplay of woody aromas, full-bodied colour and rich taste." However, the only person who has ever described it in such terms is the Public Relations Officer for Blue Nun and everyone else who has ever tasted the product has, as a rule, described it in considerably less glowing terms, with critics reviewing it variously as "revolting", "only marginally more palatable than the water that collects in the bottom of your bin" and "as dangerous to your health as breaking into Oscar Pistorius' house."
Despite this, the wine has proved to be one of Germany's more popular exports, following on from their less popular exports of National Socialism and attempted world domination, and has attempted to reinvent itself in recent years to improve its image, which has been flagging since the 1980s. Speaking to assembled media yesterday, Michael Schwarz, head of Blue Nun Wines, voiced his concerns about the impact this scandal will have on sales. "These are very serious allegations and we need time to investigate and consider the full implications," he said. However, despite his assurances of a fully open and transparent investigation, he refused to answer local media questions about the company's recent purchase of a prominent German racecourse, five thousand gas ovens and an industrial incinerator.
The scandal even appears to have damaged consumer confidence in the wine in Britain, where it has remained inexplicably popular over the years. Speaking outside a Sainsbury's off-licence in Kent last night, one Blue Nun enthusiast expressed his concern about the controversy. "I think it's outrageous that you don't know what's in these things when you buy them now," he said. "Quite frankly, if you can't trust that a cheap, German supermarket wine at £3.99 is going to be 100% cat piss then what can you trust?"
