In his last speech as the leader of the Roman Catholic Church, the Pontiff, in a departure from his usual themes of the evils of homosexuality, the evils of contraception and the often overlooked good work done by the Hitler Youth, instead made a range of diverse yet apparently unconnected proposals:
- New series of Last of the Summer Wine
- ...and a new series of that doctor bloke who solved murders... you know....it’ll come to me
- Trousers with elasticated waists to be made more available
- Green fees to be half price during the week
- Viagra on Demand
- Caravanettes to be allowed to use bus lanes
- Worthers Originals to be made available on the National Health
- Jonathan Ross and Russell Brand to be crucified
- New national speed limit of 25 mph
- Quincy...that was it!
