An extensive study from academics at Wembley University has found that online comedy articles with a Valentine's theme are an entirely acceptable way to publicly state feelings of love towards your partner. Despite what some people might think.
The research, carried out among a group of more than 58 men outside the Shell petrol station -- which is supposed to be 24 hours for heaven's sake -- found that 100% of respondents considered the time and effort it would take to start the computer, log in and publish a gently amusing but heartfelt Valentine was more meaningful than the "tired cliché" of beautiful flowers, or chocolates that would only raise the difficult question, "are you trying to make me fat?".
While some members of the research team did warn against telling a partner "there's a surprise for you if you have a look at my web browser" unless entirely confident the appropriate window was open, in general a couple of paragraphs of carefully honed prose is more suitable for a day of romance than precious jewels. Which are often mined exploitatively, with profits used to fund war, you know.
Despite the findings being welcomed almost universally by the scientific community, there are, however, still pockets of online comedy romance-deniers that reject the overwhelming peer-reviewed evidence.
A spokesperson for the sceptics was asked to contribute to this article, but apparently Mrs Snuggles Bunnybum is unwilling to comment.