What does MP3 stand for?
Sir,
‘M’ and ‘P’ are the thirteenth and fourteenth letters in the English alphabet, respectively, whilst ‘C’ is the third letter. Thus, MP3 actually stands for 1314C. 1+3+1+4 = 9, thus 9C. ‘C’ is also the Roman numeral for 100. 9 x 100 = nine hundred. The first letters of this number give us ‘NH’, which are the initials of the inventor of MP3, Neil Harris.
Adam Pennis, Coventry
Sir,
Adam Pennis’s explanation for the meaning of MP3 is sheer horseshit. As anybody who doesn’t have horseshit for brains knows, MP3 is a colloquial deviation of the pan-Germanic word empeefrey, meaning to have or to covet a blanket. It is said that MP3’s true inventor, Isaac Brokenborg, screamed the word at his wife whilst shivering in his lab on the very night he completed the world’s first ever MP3. Somehow the word stuck, thus MP3.
Simon Vulva, Staines
Sir,
What a pair of retarded cunts! Adam Pennis and Simon Vulva know fuck all about what MP3 stands for. They should stick to sucking dogs’ cocks, the tossers. MP3 simply means Musical Production Free, a crafty allusion to the liberal distribution of music its inventor, Trevor Tugoff, knew very well its invention would allow. Pennis and Vulva are about as much use as the Human Rights Act, and if I ever see either of them out and about I’ll saw their fucking heads off.
Alan Okmpress, Preed-on-the-Byle
