Following the passing of the Gay Marriage bill in Parliament, the Catholic church remained on the offensive, this time coming out against Gay Divorce.
A spokesman said, "for centuries the Catholic Church has denounced divorce as a sin. Now that man can marry man, and woman can marry woman, we are presented with a dilemma: is gay divorce something we should denounce as sinful, or celebrate as virtuous?"
"After internal debate, we've decided that divorce will stay a sacred sin between man and woman -we'll pretend that the gay marriage never happened in the first place."
He closed, "our track record on child abuse in the church shows that we are very good at pretending things didn't happen"