In the transfer day frenzy, the signature of Eric Pickles stood out as the biggest signing of the day.
Pickles will move to the Lib Dems for an undisclosed fee with David Laws moving in the opposite direction. Pickles passed his medical earlier today at Lib Dem HQ, easily consuming his own body weight in muesli.
Manager Nick Clegg stated "We are delighted Eric decided to join us as we never really replaced Cyril Smith and we believe Eric will fill that hole in our line up. As Labour showed with Prescott a fat jolly chap will be popular with the man on the Clapham omnibus and provide us with some punch in the league campaign"
Earlier in the day Nadine Dorries' move from unattached to relegation threatened UKIP was scuppered when after arriving at Heathrow she turned around and boarded a plane for Sydney.